We all expect a certain set of qualities in our life partner. It doesn’t matter what your current relationship status is. This blog has the 10 characteristics of the ideal life partner that we all want to see in our spouse or expect from our future spouse. This is not like a grocery checklist. You are not going to use this list to tick and evaluate your partner. Instead, you are going to be on the other side of the table and evaluate yourself on a scale of 1 to 10 to see if you meet the criteria of being a great life partner. We have no power or control over how others behave. But, we have the ability to improve ourselves and be the best we can. Your entire life (including you life partner) is a mirror reflexion of who you are. I you want to see a beautiful picture in the mirror, the person in front of the mirror should be worthy of it.
So, let’s get to the list and see if we are doing what we are supposed to do to be a wonderful life partner.
- Unconditional Love:
This should be the foundation of your relationship with your life partner. It means that you should love that person wholeheartedly irrespective of the situation or their behaviour. After the initial phase of love, many people start taking their partners for granted. Make sure you don’t let that happen. Love has to be expressed both in words as well as in action.
You need to be grateful for having your partner in your life. You should feel blessed as this person has agreed to spend the rest of their life with you. He/she could have chosen any other person on this planet. But, you were the chosen one. Therefore you must feel lucky.
Gratitude is what you tell yourself and the Universe. Appreciation is what you tell aloud to your partner. All of us crave for recognition. Make the extra effort to notice all the wonderful things your partner does and appreciate him/her. Appreciating in front of others is even better!
- Openness to Learn:
Every person has a unique set of skills. I strongly believe that the Universe unites two people who can complement each other’s skill sets. Your partner will possess certain talents and skills that you don’t have. Be curious and open to learn from him/her. This openness will reduce ego in any relationship.
Your life partner becomes your soul mate when you start trusting that person and having complete faith in him/her. Is it possible to doubt your own actions? No. If you start looking at your life partner as an extension of yourself, you’ll never doubt their intentions.
A healthy relationship is possible only when there is respect in it. Do you value your partner’s ideas and opinion? Do you respect him/her irrespective of what they do in life? Respect has nothing to do with how you address the person. Respect is not fear. It comes from the huge admiration that you have for the person.
Give your partner the personal space they deserve. Even if he/she is going through some challenges in life, don’t jump into offering a solution without asking for permission to do so. Though you are an integral part of your partner’s life, you are not the only thing in their life. Let them have friends you don’t know, let them pursue hobbies that don’t interest you. Let them be who they are.
We have enough people in our lives to celebrate our success, but we just need that one shoulder to lean on when we face adversities. Are you always there to provide your shoulder to your partner? Make their life easier by providing physical, mental, emotional and financial support whenever he/she needs you.
- Integrity & Honesty
Integrity is keeping up your word and doing what you have promised and honesty is being true to yourself and others. Make sure you score a 10 on 10 on this point as this is the very least that is expected from a life partner. Be brave to always speak the truth and take responsibility for facing the consequences of your actions.
Your partner is not a mind reader. Unless you speak out clearly about what you want, he/she will have no clue about what is going on in your mind. Silence can kill relationships. Make sure you spend quality time with your partner to discuss your day and communicate your needs.
I’ve known my wife for 11 years. There has not been a day when we have not spoken. On an average we spend at least an hour a day talking to each other about the projects we are working on, our aspirations, our challenges, our fears, our goals and motivate each other with ideas and encouragement. Do we ever fight? Yes, we do! But we have an agreement to resolve all our arguments within 15 minutes and patch up.
Relationships are like trees that need to be watered with love every day. Go through this life partner checklist once a month and do a self-evaluation of where you stand. You could even ask your partner to rate you and then find out how you can improve your rating. This could be an interesting experience. But beware, you life partner could be brutally honest with their feedback!
Leave your comments below on what you think about this checklist! Feel free to mention some more important life partner qualities that you think should be added.